Motherhood is one of those journeys that constantly pulls you in two (or more!) directions: one moment you’re overflowing with love and gratitude, and the next you’re crying over spilled milk (literally) and wondering if you’re cut out for this job. When I picked up M is for Mama by Abbie Halberstadt, I didn’t know exactly what to expect – maybe a little encouragement, maybe some practical tips – but what I actually found was something deeper.
It felt like part book, part pep talk, part firm nudge to give EVERYTHING to Jesus, and I don’t know about you, but I need all of that.
So instead of giving you a straight “book review”-style recap, I thought I’d share my reflections as if we were in a cozy book club together, with a little Bible-study flair.
First Impressions
When I first started the book, I was struck by how relatable Abbie’s tone was. She’s a mom of ten (yes, TEN), so you know she’s not handing out advice from an ivory tower. And yet, her encouragement isn’t fluffy and surface-level; it’s anchored firmly in Scripture and in a call to something higher.
One of her main themes is that hard doesn’t mean bad. How often do we fall into the trap of thinking that because something is difficult, it must be wrong, or we’re doing it poorly? That little line alone reframed a lot for me.
Motherhood is hard. But that doesn’t mean it’s not worth it. In fact, God often uses the hardness to grow us.
Theme 1: The Lie of “Mediocre Motherhood”
Culture loves to tell us that motherhood is about survival: “Just get through until bedtime.” “Mummy needs her wine.” “Coffee is life.” And yes – I sometimes laugh at those kinds of memes too – but after a while, they can seep into your bones and start shaping your perspective and attitudes.
Abbie calls this out as the myth of mediocre motherhood – this idea that being a “good enough” mom is all we can hope for.
But here’s what struck me: God never calls us to mediocrity in anything, let alone in raising his children.
Colossians 3:23 says, “Work willingly at whatever you do, as though you were working for the Lord rather than for people.”
That means diaper changes, bedtime battles, homeschooling lessons, even washing the dishes.
Book Club Question: Have you ever caught yourself settling for “just surviving” instead of seeing motherhood as a calling?
Theme 2: Comparison is a Thief
There’s a chapter where Abbie talks about how “no two good mamas look alike,” and I just wanted to shout AMEN. Because as we’ve all probably heard, comparison is the thief of joy.
I can’t tell you how many times I’ve scrolled Instagram and thought, She’s got it all together. Her house is clean. Her kids are well-dressed. They’ve got the most gorgeous homestead, and my kids live in a tiny apartment.
But here’s the truth: God didn’t call me to be that mom. He called me to be the mom of my children, with my strengths, my weaknesses, and his Spirit working in me.
John 21:22 reminds us: “…what is that to you? As for you, follow me.”
In other words, stop looking sideways, and start looking up. Keep your eyes on Jesus.
Book Club Question: What area of motherhood do you most often compare yourself in (meals, patience, creativity, appearance, etc.)? And what does God say about that area?
Theme 3: Self-Care vs. Soul-Care
This one hit home, too. The world is very loud about “self-care” or “self-love.” And I do believe God wants us to care for our bodies and minds. But so often, self-care is just surface level: bubble baths, wine, Netflix…
What my soul actually needs is soul-care: time with God, truth in my ears, Scripture in my heart. Because no face mask is going to heal the kind of exhaustion that comes from trying to parent in my own strength.
Matthew 11:28: “Then Jesus said, ‘Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest.‘”
True rest isn’t found in escapism. It’s found in Christ.
Reflection: Next time I’m feeling burned out, I want to pause and ask: Am I craving self-care… or soul-care?
Theme 4: Mom Guilt vs. God’s Grace
Oh, mom guilt. If it were a sport, I’d be a gold medalist. I feel guilty when I lose my temper, when I don’t spend enough time on crafts, when dinner is too simple, when the laundry isn’t done… the list goes on.
Abbie reminded me that not all guilt is bad. Sometimes the Holy Spirit convicts us, and that’s an invitation to repent and change. But a lot of what we call “mom guilt” is just noise. It’s the enemy whispering that we’re failing when really, we’re faithfully showing up.
Romans 8:1 says, “So now there is no condemnation for those who belong to Christ Jesus.”
Guilt pushes me down. Grace lifts me up and equips me to try again.
Book Club Question: What “mom guilt” do you carry that you need to surrender to Jesus?
Theme 5: Gentleness Isn’t Weakness
Another section I loved was about gentleness. Our culture often sees gentleness as weakness, but biblically, it’s actually strength under control.
For me, gentleness is probably one of the hardest fruits of the Spirit to live out as a mom (especially around 5 p.m. when everyone is melting down). But the reminder was this: God doesn’t ask me to muster up gentleness out of thin air – he grows it in me as I walk with him.
Galatians 5:22-23 lists gentleness as one of the fruits of the Spirit.
That means it’s not about me gritting my teeth – it’s about abiding in him.
Challenge: Pick one recurring situation that usually ends in frustration, and ask God to help you approach it with gentleness.
Theme 6: Guarding Our Homes
One of my biggest takeaways was the reminder that as mothers, we are the gatekeepers of our homes. That doesn’t mean control everything or bubble-wrap our kids, but it does mean being mindful of what we allow in. Media, attitudes, schedules, even friendships can shape the atmosphere of our home.
That convicted me. Because sometimes I let things slide just to make life “easier,” but I forget that little compromises add up.
Proverbs 4:23: “Guard your heart above all else, for it determines the course of your life.”
That’s true for us mamas, and it’s true for our children.
Book Club Question: What’s one small change you could make to better guard the atmosphere of your home?
Theme 7: You Don’t Have to Do It All
Finally, the chapter I think every mom needs tattooed on them somewhere: you don’t have to do it all.
I have this picture in my head of the “ideal Christian mom” – homeschooling, baking bread, sewing matching clothes, volunteering at church, running marathons. And the truth is… God didn’t call me to all of that. He called me to faithfulness in the lane I’m in.
Matthew 6:33 says, “Seek the Kingdom of God above all else, and live righteously, and he will give you everything you need.
God doesn’t expect perfection. He expects dependence.
Book Club Question: What’s one big thing on your plate right now that you could lay down or share with someone else?
Wrapping It Up
If we were sitting together right now, mugs in hand, I’d probably say: This book was more than I expected. It reminded me that I’m not alone, that motherhood is holy ground, and that God’s grace is enough even on the hardest days.
I think that’s the beauty of M is for Mama: it doesn’t sugarcoat the challenges, but it keeps pointing us back to Jesus as the source of strength, patience, and joy.
So, if you’re feeling weary, overwhelmed, or just curious how motherhood can be more than memes about survival, I’d recommend this one. And if you read it, let’s chat about it on social media – I’d love to hear your takeaways too. Because at the end of the day, none of us have this all figured out. But together, leaning on God, we can really thrive in motherhood – not just survive it.
Practical Next Steps
If you’re anything like me, you don’t just want to read a book and nod along – you want to know how to live it out. Here are a few simple ways to take the themes of M is for Mama off the page and into real life:
Journal Prompts
- Where am I tempted to “just survive” instead of leaning into God’s strength?
- What comparison trap do I need to surrender to Jesus today?
- Which area of “mom guilt” is weighing me down, and how can I replace it with God’s truth?
Scripture to Meditate On
- Colossians 3:23 – Work as unto the Lord, even in the unseen tasks.
- Matthew 11:28-30 – Jesus offers rest for weary mothers.
- John 21:22 – No comparison needed.
- Galatians 5:22-23 – The fruit of the Spirit grows in us as we abide in Christ.
- Romans 8:1 – No condemnation for those in Christ Jesus.
(Tip: write on verse on a sticky note and put it above your sink, on the fridge, or aomewhere you’ll see it often this week.)
Small Challenges for the Week
- Swap Self-Care for Soul-Care – Next time you feel overwhelmed, pause before Netflix/phone/coffee and ask: “Have I sat with God yet today?” Even 5 minutes can reset your spirit.
- Practice Gentleness in One Hot Spot – Identify one recurring moment that usually leads to frustration (bedtime, mealtime, getting out the door). Pray before it starts, asking the Spirit to grow gentleness in you.
- Declutter One Influence – Ask yourself: “What’s one thing I’m allowing into my home that isn’t serving my kids’ hearts?” (This could be a TV show, a toy, a schedule commitment.) Remove or adjust it.
- Release One Guilt – Name one area you’ve been feeling “less than” and pray Romans 8:1 over it. Replace the guilt with gratitude.
Book Club Challenge
- Share one takeaway with a friend, text group, or mom you trust. Sometimes speaking it aloud is what cements it in your heart.
- If you’re reading with others, pick one theme (like gentleness or soul-care) to focus on together for a week, and check in on each other.
Final Encouragement
Motherhood will always stretch us. It will pull us to the end of ourselves – and that’s right where Jesus meets us. Let’s not settle for surviving anymore. Let’s pray, “Lord, help me see motherhood as you see it. Give me the strength, the patience, and the joy that comes from you alone.”